Bachelorette Party

I had a great time last night, thanks girls and Jay! There were only a few of us, but that was nice. Didn't have to worry about everyone getting lost... It was Sarah*, Alissa, Andrea, Jennifer and I. Andrea's friend Jay drove. It was his first bachelorette party, so he sat back and observed. We played games and everything before we went out. The 'According to Shaun' game was pretty fun, I only didn't know about 4. And one was because Shaun messed up and 'lied' about his first dog. And I had a list that I had to accomplish - at first I was like, "no way", but after a little liquid courage it became much easier. Haha. :) I got to talk to Andrea's boyfriend Brandon, and he talked me into completing one of my objectives. Then Sarah*s friend Elias called her and I got to talk to him. It was interesting... I think... Shaun called at 3:30 - he's lucky we were still awake!! So I ended up talking a lot on the phone, but I can't really remember what I said - so if I said something bad or upsetting or something, sorry! But once again, I just want to thank everyone for the great night! :-D

I am so sick...

My throat itches, my nose is alternately runny or dry and cracked and painful... my body aches and my ears won't pop. Can I die? Ugh. What horrid timing for this! Grrrrr.....

It's inching closer and closer...

But I'm really not all that worried about it. My biggest worry is that I won't fit into my dress. Since I have no scale, I have no idea how my weight is being regulated. All I know is that I've put some on... haha. So, here's hoping it fits still! *fingers crossed*

We'll have to go pick up the marriage license tomorrow, since Shaun didn't have the receipt to do it today. BUT of course, he IS going to register his buddy V for the disc golf tournament... Oh, yeah. I didn't mention that. So, the 27th (yes, that's right, the weekend after we get married) he's going to be in a disc golf tournament here with JP, Steve, and V. Goody. So, we don't get a honeymoon, Shaun has to work all week, and our first weekend together married he's going to be in a frigging disc golf tournament. I just wish he would have thought about how important it would be to me that we get the whole weekend together to do something, instead of not seeing him all day Saturday and I get to sit here by myself... But there is a Pat McCurdy concert that night so maybe I'll go to that...

I had to go buy more centerpieces since we're having more tables than I thought. Did you know that to have lights and tulle on the tables it costs $100? Ridiculous, but it's a nice touch so I decided to go with it. Yikes. Let's just hope our cake doesn't cost more than it has to.... haha! :) I can't wait for you all to see it, I think that it's going to be absolutely beautiful. :) I just hope things click together like I think they should.

Tonight we're meeting with Pastor Paul. We get to see the results of the Prepare test that we took. It should be interesting. Haha. And we get to do some discussion of the book that we read, so we'll have to do a refresher tonight. I really should take a nap, but I have too much to do. I'm coming down with a cold. :( Perfect, Rudolph nose for wedding pics. GREAT.

Robert Miles

I decided to look him up on myspace tonight... and just listening to the music had caused tears to well up and slowly fall down my cheek...

I bought that CD either just before Shaun and I started dating or right after. We would listen to it as we went to sleep on the futon in my room. It just brings back all the memories and feelings of that time - excitement, giddiness, uncertainty, happiness, contentment, love, attraction... feeling like my flesh and bones are going to burst through my skin, because it couldn't contain how happy I was. I can just see my dorm room softly lighted with the christmas lights I had (dorm room staple!)... and having this warm caring person next to me. Knowing that for right now, everything will be all right. This person cares and wants to be with me.

Things have changed somewhat, that initial excitement isn't there any more. We now know each other so well - there are only a few things left undiscovered. We love each other for sure now, but it's definitely harder than it was at first, when we were trying so hard to please each other. When we were trying to impress so much. When we were hiding the bad things about ourselves. But that's what marriage is, isn't it? Work - because it isn't the way that movies portray life. Romantic life. But it's alright that it's work - we love each other and that's why we're willing to work at it. Life isn't like a movie.

And it further amazes me that music can do this - crystallize feelings and memories so well that listening to the music makes you feel like you are experiencing it all over again. It reminds me of an insect trapped in amber... It's not like it was, but you can still see it and feel it. Poignancy only somewhat diminished - and perhaps even softened in memory -possibly making it better than it actually was, because now you know how much it actually meant to you. It makes me wonder how I will feel if I happen to listen to music that I haven't listened to in years, what memories it will conjure up - good, bad, happy, sad, destructive, healing...? I suppose only time will tell.

I guess that the slight melancholia that Mr. Robert Miles has caused to rise up in me is all for the good - it was a reminder of why I am marrying this man that is now in our bedroom, asleep, and probably snoring. Because he loves me and wants only good things for me. He wants to keep me safe and happy. He wants to see what our children will look like - what he and I look like mixed together. And I want to do all of the same things for him. And upon reflection, that for him and I, that is what love is.

Crunch time...

T-Minus 14 days until our wedding. Yikes. It's approaching quickly. But we have most things done. Just realized we have to get more centerpieces done! We're going to be having more tables than we thought, plus the head table! Sheesh. So, I'll be getting to be 'crafty' soon. I also have to finish up our programs. Shaun said that he'd be folding about 20 per night. Yeah, right. He forgot. Shocking. So he said that he'd get working on it. I have to finish designing them anyway, but I'd like to have them crossed off my list.

We went and applied for our marraige license yesterday. We tried finding 555 Cedar, and found 540, but after 540 was the capital building. So, we figured that wasn't it. So we ended up going to the courthouse, and they told us where it was. Never would have found it. But we got it filled out, had to raise our right hands and swear that all the information on it was right, and then we get to pick it up Thursday. We almost would have been really rushing it due to our pastor - who had it in mind that our wedding was FEBRUARY 21st. Ummm... no. He called me on Wednesday to see when we should get together and we agreed on the 12th. But then I asked him if that would be enough time to get our wedding license. He said yes, then 'wait... when's your wedding?' And I told him the 21st... and he said, 'That's what I thought. Yes, that should be plenty of time.' And I said 'Two weeks?' Haha. He had me really worried. So that's more or less taken care of.

Last week I went up to my aunt Connie's and we did all of the centerpieces and the flowers (gorgeous!). I'm going to have to go to Michael's or Joann Fabrics today to get more centerpieces. But that's alright. It'll give me something to do (besides the programs). I need ribbon for those anyway. And I think that after going to MO yesterday we got most things squared away. Which is good. She's going to send us a preliminary bill and seating arrangement. So that'll be nice... I'm trying to keep the cost of the cake down so that we can just hit our minimum. And I think that I'll probably be the only person at the head table drinking champagne. Maybe the girls will, but I highly doubt the guys will.

My photographer and I keep missing each other's phone calls to get the day lined up so I can get a timeline for everyone going. I also have to call our wedding coordinator to find out if our readers need to come to rehearsal. But we did get another copy of our ceremony so now I can get their readings to them. :) I didn't write down which ones we ended up going with, but we did tell Pastor Paul, who wrote everything down. And then Shaun decided he needed to clean his car and threw it out. Grr. Oh, well. It figures, the one time he decides to clean something he gets super thorough. :)

We haven't been doing much... Dec. 31st we went out with Andrea and Brandon and Ben and Beth. I haven't seen Ben in years. So that was fun. :) We ate at the Malt Shoppe and then went bowling. I super sucked. I haven't bowled in a couple of years now. Yikes. New Year's Shaun and I purchased a couple of DVD's and went home and watched them. Shaun barely held out for midnight, then we both went off to bed. How exciting. Like I said - we don't do much. But that's alright. :)

I am SO excited for the wedding. To get married to Shaun will be great. And the party afterwards will be super fun, too! :)